Seuss Day at work

I was starting my day,
Just beginning my shift,
when I noticed my mind
was attempting to drift.
I forceably brought it
back down to the present,
but in it, my heart,
rather clearly, just wasn't.

Guarding my who-ville
from threats large and small
was a task that required
my brain and my all.
Thus, I set up a game
requirin' me to think;
Was rewarded by feeling
my anxieties shrink.

I'm off checking the team rooms,
cubicles, bathrooms and halls
while leaving my partner
at the desk fording calls.

We excel at maintaining
all serene and secure.
Site access problems?
We diagnose and then cure.
I also check boilers,
the heavy machinery too,
though if it broke down,
what the heck could I do?

In the stale boiler room,
feeling light hearted.
I happened to wonder,
had someone just farted?
I've quite often noticed,
as on foot I've patrolled
that the mechanical rooms
smell rather musty and old.

Damn. No more cake.
Someone took it away.
How can they expect me
to get through my day?
I guzzle my coffee,
It's flavor's improvin'
but my doc and my tummy
are sharply reprovin'.

Someone left notes comparin'
happiness to a hat.
That it's hollow and empty?
I don't think they meant THAT.
The people that work here
are funny and kind.
Leaving jokes and small toys,
even puzzles, I find.

My cell phone is dying,
the battery's toast.
Of the energy left,
I must make the most.

The packet of crackers'
still left on the stairs.
Doesn't the perp know
That this mess is theirs?

Lunch is still soup.
It makes my brain suck.
Few more lunches like this,
and I won't give a crap.
Okay, so my rhymes
are often quite dirty,
but trust my IQ
is one hundred and thirty

No nachoes today,
'cause I've run out of loonies
I could loan myself out,
"Watch your back for 2 toonies."

When I get home late,
my house is so freezin'
get out of bed later?
need one heck of a reason!

So I give you my efforts
be they awesome or poor
In the vague little hopes
that my blog, you'll adore.
But if anyone else
wants to try this as well;
please bear in mind,
I'm a Seuss-er, Profession'l.