Friday, January 25, 2008

Interview fiction number 1

[Beginning of recording]
Subject #5398
Regarding: Occurance on January 23, 2008 in Vermont

Interviewer: Please state your name for the record.
Subject: Oh, uh, Vanessa. Vanessa Jones. My momma called me that cause, uh, she liked it.
I: Thank you. Can you describe what happened the night of January twenty third?
S: Sure. Well, it's like I told the constable, I get up every morning around five to check on the cows 'cause that's when they get up too, so by nine, I'm tired, but I was wide awake then, so I was out on my best horse, her name's Pennyforth Bedelia's Best Amsforth the fifth, but we call her Gedova 'cause it don't matter what it is she, [Laugh] she'll "ged ova" it. Get it?
I: Understood. Please continue.
S: So I was out ridin' and I saw some lights on the stable roof which really ain't good cause it scares the horses and then they run but they can't run nowheres, so then you get a meatgrinder kinda thing and you can lose $600 on a prize thoroughbred for a scar 'cause it ruins the line of the horse, you know? so I was going over to check
[sound of door opening]
Visitor: Sir? There's a call for you on line one.
I: Not now.
V: Understood. Sorry sir.
[door closes]
S: You can take the call, I don't mind. I got Donna to feed the horses n' stuff so...
I: It's fine. You are our top priority right now.
S: Oh! Well, Thank you very much. I've never been a priority before.
I: A shame. Please, continue.
S: Anyway, I go into the barn with my shotgun ready
I: I'm sorry. Why did you initially bring your shotgun?
S: Oh, no. Mine's in the house. I keep an extra in the barn. When you got $500,000 in, uh, "moveable assets", if you don't have a gun you got $500,000 in, uh, "nothing". So. There you go.
I: A prudent move.
S: Is it?
I: I believe so. Please, continue.
S: So anyway, when I got in there, the horses weren't moving, just starin' at a person at the end of the barn, where I got the horse insem'nator? That's the thing where you fill it with [Portion deleted]
I: Uh, We'll attach a diagram.
S: You okay? You're all pink.
I: Thank you. I'm fine. Please, uh, continue. Maybe with more detail about the figure?
S: Yah, sure. So he was starin' at my newest, Marybell's Triumph. She was in stall 70, right here. [Paper shuffling]
I: Please refer to diagram two "Blueprint of barn", stall 70.
S: We just did.
I: No, I mean for the listener.
S: Oh.
I: Please?
S: Right, so I asked who it was 'cause last week we gotta little boy here, wanted to ride a horse, so he snuck right outta bed and walked here from town, but I didn't want to scare no kid, so, you know.
I: What did the figure do?
S: He, well, It, I guess, turned and howled at me! Like, Like a wolf howl, but worse! I never been so scared in my life! I seen a momma bear up close and it weren't near as bad! I was so terrified, I thought I'd die and...
I:That accounts for, uh, substance b found at the scene?
[silence]
I: Let the record show the subject nodded affirmation. ... It was at this time that Marybell's Triumph was killed?
S: Yah, and I, uh, I don't know why it... [sniffling]
I: We can take a break. We don't have to rush. Would you like some coffee?
[silence- 10 seconds]
I: You don't have to do this now we can...
S: What? No, uh, no. I'm okay.
I: Well, we'll take a break. Shutting off recording.
I: Resuming interview after 15 minute break. Alright. How did you respond to the figure's actions?
S: I shot it.
I: You shot...could you be more specific?
S: I shot it. In the face.
I: Accounting for injury C. Did this have any effect?
S: Yah. It jumped at me, with it's claws. And did this. [Cloth rustling]
I: Subject is gesturing to injuries 12 through 17.
S: 12? No, it didn't
I: You have some old injuries we observed: a compound fracture, a few puncture wounds...
S: Oh. I see. Heh. I remember that tree.
I: You used to climb [Portion deleted]
S: [Laughing]
I: Yeah, right. Sorry. Hehe.Uh, how did you respond to the attack?
S: [Laughs]I gave it [Paper shuffling]injuries d through q.
I: Ah. The report is unspecific as to what weapon you used.
S: Oh, well, I was so mad, I couldn't reload so I just hit it. Uh, with my hands. Well, my fists.
[pause 45 seconds]
I: I've seen the injury photographs. You are a remarkable woman, Vanessa.
S: Thank you, Mister...?
I: Call me Brian.
S: Thanks, Brian.
I: Um [coughs] So, after that?
S: Oh, that's the weird bit! I blacked out and woke up by the fifth mile marker! Next to that poor man! Is he okay? Your men were helping him but wow, he was wreck! All covered in blood! and he was, we were...but we didn't...I mean...I don't really remember, but I don't think...
I: There is no evidence to suggest conjugal relations. So, you did not know the man?
S: No, I don't, well, didn't. So, he's dead?
I: He died from multiple injuries caused by a blunt object. Exacerbated by a shotgun wound. To the face.
S: He...But, I didn't...Oh no. No. I didn't kill him. The thing in the barn couldn't have been a man! It was crazy! The claws! Didn't you look at his hands?
I: We are still looking into possible explanations.
S: Have you thought it could be a...
I: A what?
S: Well, it's silly, but my daddy used to tell me an old indian legend about the Wendigo. I mean, it's just a child's tale, but after that night, well...
I: Have you signed the confidentiality agreement? Are you aware that there may be Fatal reprecussions for discussing anything you are told here?
S: Yah, of course, but I didn't think they were serious...
I: I'm afraid so. We belive that we are dealing, indeed, with a Wendigo, as you mentioned. We are unaware how to combat the problem.
S: The problem? But I ...oh...
[Silence- 35 seconds]
I: You may no longer contact anyone you know. You must give up your farm, although you may transfer the horses to a new location, provided no one you know can track them. You must remain with an agent at all times until you have remained in the service for two years. You will be employed with us. You will be given a badge and gun. You will be taught all you need to know. You will be provided with everything you need, but your life will essentially belong to the force. Sign here please.
[Pause of 2 minutes, including paper shuffling.]
I: Welcome to the force.
S: [heavy breathing]
I: Vanessa, it's not as bad as it seems. I promise.
S: I can keep the horses?
I: It will need to be an exclusive ranch, hidden from the public, and you will need to sell them under a pseudonem, and fire your ranch hands
S: hand. Only ever had the one.
I: Right. but other then that, you can run it how you like, assuming it doesn't interfere with your duties.
S: Which are?
I: You'll receive a full briefing after lunch.
S: Ah.
[Silence- 7 minutes]
I: You are smiling?
S: This is [laughs] kinda cool. I'm mean, I've always wanted an adventure.
I: You are really remarkable.
S: [laughs] Thanks, Brian.
I: I, uh, was wondering if you wanted to
[end of tape]

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow! Well done! Except ... "congenital"? Meaning present at birth? Maybe "conjugal" meaning related to marriage.
lol, mapa

Miss Ernst said...

...Damn. It sounded so good in my head. : p
Is english really my first language?
Yowza

Or what about Congenial? Maybe they were just really nice to each other? Or Conjunctive? well, maybe conjunctive... : p