Wednesday, November 28, 2007

If comics are any indication...

The thing I'm going to like the most about the future is the food.
No, I'm serious. Read "Transmetropolitan" and tell me some of that food doesn't sound crazy good. Or My second favoritest webcomic, "Templar, Arizona":

"I'd like a coke, please."
"Honey Garlic, Cayenne Chocolate, or Yogurt Plum?"

Oh yes.
Perhaps it is simply that I can not identify with the subject's lifestyle, it being so strange from my own, but Eating is somewhat universal. I cannot guess what it tastes like, but I can speculate.

Maybe I'm just writing this post because I believe everyone should read Transmet and Templar.
Oh well.

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Enough is the hell enough.

I work nights. It's true. I am up from midnight to eight in the morning.
I am also heavily involved in several other endeavors in my life including Kung Fu, Police volunteering, and Secretary of animethon. I'm pretty busy. I don't usually get a lot of sleep. Sleeping during the day makes it especially tempting to cut short my sleeping hours to get more things done during daylight hours.

When, however, did it become socially acceptable, even considered "a joke", to tell me I look tired?!
I don't tell people when they look ignorant, or hungry, or anything else wrong, but at least once a day a person I don't know will say, "You look tired.".

I actually make the effort to do my hair, make sure my uniform is clean and tidy, and make sure my manner is bright, and pleasant.

So Why the hell do people tell me this?!

And how the hell do I respond?! My usual response is, "I'm fine, thank you, how are you?" But I think perhaps it is time for a crusade against this rude casual remark. I wish I could respond with, "and you look stupid, but in a minute both of us will look angry."

Siiigh. What I wouldn't give for a mandatory "social graces" course.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

Flames to dust, Lovers to Friends, why do all good things come to an end?

STOP TRIVIALIZING THE LADY SHORTCAKE! SHE DOES NOT ACCEPT YOUR PUNY ATTEMPTS AT HUMOR! Her reign will rule over all in a flood of sugary tears and gnashing of cavity filled teeth! At her right hand, Mistress Muffin will march forth with a licorice fist to crush the uprising! The seas will boil to deep fry all who resist!Their families will be baked in the heat of the desert, then frosted and devoured! The world shall be razed, and used as a mixing bowl to further refine the treacle mined in the pits of other planets! All shall work until they are consumed! Then you will know the true power of Strawberry! AND DO NOT SQUEEZE THE PROPHETESS CHELLE! SHE IS THE BEARER OF THE WORD MADE ICING! DAMNIT STOP LAUGHING!

On a more serious and happy note; I have an interview with the police force for Saturday to determine my suitability for volunteering with them. They have even started to pohone my references. I'm so excited!!

Thursday, November 08, 2007

By the pricking of my thumbs,

These past few days have been running. Constant running.

I seem to have fallen off the edge of my little paper world, and I'm not sure where to find it again, twisting in this void.

I sense a looming something. I have that feeling of change, like glass and fruit in my mouth. I'm not sure what, or where.

There was a pinpointable moment, when I missed my connection bus day before yesterday, when a violin string was prepped, and now it is just spooling out, gaining in tension, and all I can do is be on guard for when it snaps.

Perhaps it is the change in weather that effects my mood. The snow makes me think logically, but angrily. A sort of frigid villiany. I am happy, don't mistake me, but also aggressive. Like a flame-filled ice-cube.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007


I almost forgot.
Othello, the ballet.
Brilliant costumes colored in pink, red, maroon, burgundy, gold, a set which was perfect in it's simplicity featuring airy swaths of fabric suggesting eveything from walls to stormy skies, and the choreography was pleasant. The dancer playing Iago was perfectly heinous. A true villian from his black jerkin to the tip of his gyrating toe. The only character which came close was Casio's love interest, Bianca, who coveyed sheer lust so effectivly, that her applause was loudest, despite having maybe 7 minutes on stage. She sashayed, she strutted, she tango-ed, Hell, I think she may have even rhumba-ed. With two huge flowers in her hair, she frolicked her way on stage, and made off with the audience's heart. The love affair between her and Casio threatened to steal the show were it not for the fact that the main couple was soon to die afterwards.

The only problems; The actor playing Othello wasn't black. The only important detail about the characters at all, and they botch it.
The funny thing was, in the play, Othello suffers from seizures. When Iago convinces him that Desdemona is cheating on him, he has a fit. I assumed this would be conveyed in subtle dance tones, and perhaps imaginative lighting. Oh no. Hell no. The actor threw himself on stage and had a seizure. (probably not a real one). I was awestruck. My jury is still out as to whether this was brilliant, or inept.

All in all, totally worth seeing.

Kung Fu

I had always believed that Kung Fu was in fact, a myth. A term made up to describe a child's fascination with "ass-kicking". I have recently come to discover, in my endeavor to learn a martial art, that this is not so.

After attending a few dojos, I found one which suits my liking, at the university of Alberta. The program teaches Wing Chun style Kung Fu (oh you know I feel badass just saying that) and numbers over 50 strong. it is a seriously huge class. I'm gratefied to note that I am not the oldest one present, as was the case with the last class I had attended.

The style itself is rather beautiful, featuring a series of blocks and blows that originate from the sternum, aiming at the opponenet's sternum. It is a style of subtle turns, shifts, and redirection. The blocks become almost effortless. Although it is aimed at being a strictly function, energy-efficient style, they are teaching us a few stances that simply look pretty, and focus one's energy. I have learned so far the: Horse stance (much like riding a horse), Bow stance (Like a lunge at full-forward), the cat stance (all weight on one back, bent leg, the front leg slightly bent and gracefully curved. Crazy tiring), and the monkey stance (consisting of a series of stances and moves which, when put together, look "really bitchin'"). I am sore all over, but I can't wait for the next class. The instructors are patient, and the timing is good; if I am sensible, I can stop at home, from the class, for a half-hour, then depart to catch my bus for work. If I'm not sensible, I can just bring my uniform and lounge in the gym showers for a half-hour or more.

Now to gush like a child;
When I used to watch Mulan, (yes, the disney movie, shush)I loved the shoes they wore for training. Little, black, almond shaped with a gold stripe around the bottom, I thought they were adorable. and, like Kung Fu, I had thought them fake. They totally aren't. Silly me. I need to obtain a pair cause, damn. SO CUTE. Couple them with the uniform of Kung Fu, and I'm sure I'll feel legitimate!

Ah, I jest. I've picked it up remarkably quickly, and the instructor has had only a few brief suggestions during class for me. I feel gratified. :) My next class is tonight, but I may be unable to attend, due to bad timing with my Certified Protection Officer training, which I thought had been moved to Thursday. Now I'm so confused I don't know what's what.
More later.

Thursday, November 01, 2007

Discworld Guide by Terry Pratchett

I would really love to inflict the Discworld series on everyone I know, but it gets difficult to explain everything about them all to a new reader. So I've banged out this reference to help people make an informed choice about what to read first.
To best select which you should start with, you need to answer a couple questions. His Discworld ones, the most famous and prolific, have several running story lines, all with different themes and feelings. The main ones, and best to start with are: The witches of Lancre, The City Watch, Rincewind, Death and his relatives, or the Industrial Revolution.
The witches’ series is mainly philosophical, with an emphasis on the absurdity of our society and beliefs, and helping to understand our own history of paganism and such. Also focuses quite heavily on morality, (Arguably my favorite brain read). If you read any in order, it is these ones I would recommend to do so; ESPECIALLY the trilogy of Wyrd sisters, Witches abroad, and Lords and Ladies.
The City watch is my current favorite, mostly due to my interest in the military and police work. Focuses on the development of Ankh-Morpork (the main Discworld city), and explores the nature of existentialism, the self, and also Justice. Also includes the bonus character of Vetinari the ruler of Ankh-Morpork, who is arguably the most fascinating character on the Disc. He really steals the show. But then he makes is better, more organized, and sort of gives it back, while still maintaining complete control, and tells you it’s all yours again, but you have to run it exactly how he says because If you don’t, well, nothing bad would happen, but think of your delightful children, and wonderful wife, currently residing at (insert address here)? Wouldn’t they be disappointed in you? Plus he calls himself a tyrant. Rincewind is the best series to start with if you want to understand the climate of the whole Disc. Also discusses the nature of the magic on the Disc and the relationship between our science and the Disc. Includes a focus on the idiosyncrasies of our love for heroes.
Last, but not least, the Death series (ha ha). An all encompassing view of the Discworld (Death himself is present in every novel), with an interest to examining the nature of death, life, the human condition, as well as fate and destiny. Another good series to read in order, as the evolution of the primary two characters, Death and his granddaughter Susan, is quite fascinating. Death actually grows, learns, and changes markedly throughout.
Finally, the Industrial Revolution is a series of books examining the nature of Cities, economics, and, well, revolutions. Also focuses on the development of ankh-Morpork, with a view to the minuet everyday life of the average denizen.

If you wish to start with the Witches, they are the longest running series, starting with Equal Rites, moving into Wyrd sisters, Witches abroad, Lords and Ladies, Carpe Jugulum, then Masquerade, also involving the City watch somewhat, then Wee free men, Hat Full of sky, and Wintersmith. This series includes two short stories I have been unable to locate called “The Little Fish and the sea” and some other one possibly involving pink.
To start the City Watch series, you should begin with Men at Arms, Guards! Guards!, Feet of Clay, Jingo (my longest running favorite), The Fifth Elephant, Nightwatch, then Thud!. If you would like to mesh them, Masquerade would be read in between Jingo and The Fifth Elephant.
The Rincewind novels start with the first Discworld novel, but have not been updated in a while. They begin Color of Magic, The Light Fantastic, Sorcery, Faust (Eric), Interesting Times, The Last Continent, and finally The Last Hero. This series, if read with the Witches, should be read in an alternating fashion. For the witches and wizards meet in Lords and Ladies and there is some confusion over headmasters at Unseen University (the main place for the Rincewind series). Equal Rites should be read after Color of Magic but before Sorcery, as the head Witch takes a trip to the University and meets the headmaster. The Last Hero should be read in between The Fifth Elephant and Nightwatch as it involves a main City Watch character.

The Industrial Revolution series is short, Moving Pictures, The Truth, Monstrous Regiment, Going Postal, then the newest addition, Making Money. This should not be started until after Jingo, Interesting Times, and Masquerade, since it will affect your perception of Ankh-Morpork.

The Death Series, although he is in every book, is primarily: Mort, Reaper man, Soul Music also involving the wizards, Hogfather, then Thief of Time. Soul Music should be read before Interesting Times, and Hogfather should be read after Jingo.

There are a few random books which sort of have an order; Pyramids and Small Gods should be read before Thief of Time, and Carpe Jugulum. The Science books (The science of Discworld I, II, III) can be read any time after The Last Continent. The Amazing Maurice and his Educated Rodents should be read by candlelight in the tub, to achieve the full effect, but other than that, go nuts.

The new spring love

I love
sunset is like warm autumn fury,
the clouds like sticky sweet cherubs;
and if I close my eyes , the wind, like a new lover,
whispers me into a newborn child,
amazed at the colors and laughing at the birds.