Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Gerard Way Would Not Approve

There was an article today that was just so strange that I was determined to find a way to make it a proper blog post, and I have used the flimsiest of pretenses to bring it to you.
Fecal transplants.
You mean facial transplants?
No, my Dear Reader, I mean fecal transplants.
You mean poop?
Yes I do. A new procedure is being looked at closely, but not too closely because it smells, by health care boards in B.C which could potentially save many patients from fatal infections. The process removes poop from healthy patient's intestines and plants it into frail patients who are suffering from intestinal infections in the hopes that the "good" bacteria will overpower the "bad" bacteria although how this is done is not outlined. There are two ways though: one being surgical, which is not a good option on those already frail; and one is kind of like the time I pushed out too much toothpaste and tried to feed it back in to the tube with a pair of tweezers and a cotton swab.

It  is a solid concept, and the practice is apparently widely used in Europe, but testing trials are still two years away from approval over here, and some doctors are grousing. One doctor in B.C was continuing the practice until she was stopped by the health board (No word on whether the cease and desist order included the phrase "Cut that shit out"). Her complaint is that she believes she could save people's lives but is forced to watch them suffer instead because the board is still approving the process.
The vice-president of Medicine of the FHA says that "She is being blocked by a system that puts patient safety first." and let me be the first to say, "Thank Goodness."

Maybe this procedure is the global savior. Maybe this procedure is hearts and ponies everywhere. But maybe it is a gigantic mistake and we have no idea yet. We have no idea until we test. That is why we test. Because if we just start to eyeball the procedures, we are going to start admitting in problems. The cardinal rule of medicine, Mr. Hippocrates' big number one, is "Do no harm". It sucks, but what are you going to do?

Incidentally the title is a tasteless joke:
"Be yourself, don`t take anyone`s shit, and never let them take you alive." - Gerard Way


Andreanna said...

Hey, whatever works.

If I had diarrhea for 3 years, and could not actually walk to the bathroom anymore, I'd be asking for my shit enema. Just saying.

We learned about fecal transplants in our first semester. Lots of ick factor, but considering we use leech spit and rat poison as anticoagulants, not as much as you'd think.

Anonymous said...

I'm with Andreanna and I often wonder why we're the last to get to things. If it's already "widely used in Europe", why are we so behind? So often, I think, the medical profession here waits for the US to adopt something first. Drives me crazy.
lol, mapa