Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Payment Accomplished!

"Good Morning, Ms. Pun'd it! This is #name redacted# calling from your local Chrysler dealership, how are you today?"

"I'm quite good. What is this call in regards to?"

"Well, Mrs. Pun'd it, our records show that you purchased a new Chrysler vehicle last year on financing, is that correct?"

"Yeah, it's pretty good. Nice to be mobile again. You know, have options."

"That's great, ma'am, but we noticed you haven't made this months payment; we were wondering if there was a more convenient payment plan you might prefer."

"No, no, nothing like that. I paid last month's a week early, hey?"

"We noticed, but we don't put much bearing into that, so I'm not sure why that would matter."

"Well, I just figured since I had paid earlier than you expected, I just wouldn't pay anymore."

"I...I'm sorry?"

"Yeah, I'm done. I think I've paid enough. We're good."

"Uh, no you still owe a sizable amount on your total."

"Look, I'm sure we can both agree it's better for both of us if I keep the car - it is free advertising for you guys, hey? - and I can't work without my car, so I just won't pay anymore."

"You can't do that, you have to pay what you owe."

"How about you can come over to my house whenever you want, how about that?"

"No that's not going to work at all. Why don't I forward you through to a manager?"

My next plan, if this falls through, is just to get really fat and claim I'm "too big to fail".
(Incidentally I did get a new car this month but it was a Prius and I am doing fine on my payments.)
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